SpanishRed

If You Grow Up in a Dysfunctional Family

If you grow up in a dysfunctional family, you will learn silence. Anything less exposes you to attack. Vulnerability is not a path towards intimacy, but an opportunity for abuse. And so you will spend your life hiding in corners digging through sh...

Pictures of my home

This is my beach. This is the place I love. 

Thi...

This little mollusc has been on quite a journey

Scientific Facts About Blowjobs

• According to a Lancet study, blowjobs cure manflu in 100% of cases. Once the blowjob is over, the manflu will reappear in 100% of cases. This is incontrovertible proof that penis owners require 50 blowjobs a day.
• According to anothe...
  2023-12-15 05:50:45 +0000 UTC View Post

What Kink Has Taught Me About Platonic Vanilla Relationships

I recently watched a two-year friendship melt into a toxic cesspool of gaslighting and mean-spiritedness. I cut contact based on two meagre conversations — Something my pre-kink self would never have done. She always tried to forgive because eve...

Some Men Are Just Too Fancy With Too Few Holes

Me: He was literally running the country, but he never stood me up. Not once. He drove almost two hours to see me all through the week.
Jo: That’s lovely. So why did you break up?
Me: He was too fancy for me.
Jo: Whut?
Me: He was too...

Are You in the Kink Scene To Find Something New Or Are You Here to Destroy Something Old?

Some sadists do this thing we do because they love BDSM.

Some sadists do it because they hate women.

Some dominants are in it for the power exchange, and some are in it because they need to control everything around them to feel whole....

Some sadists do this thing we do because they love BDSM. Some do it because they hate women.

Some sadists do this thing we do because they love BDSM.

Some sadists do it because they hate women.

Some dominants are in it for the power exchange, and some are in it because they need to control everything around them to feel whole....

My New Wuzzy Thoy

I wigured I thould thell you awout my new wuzzy toy. The pwoblem ith I can’th thawk anywore affer my wight with my toy because my teef fell ouw. Oh wight. I’m noth thawking. I’m thyping. Lemme thry awen.

I have Stronic-induced encephal...

Sometimes a Bad Sub is the Best Kind of Sub To Be

I’m not a sub because I’m a submissive person. I’m a sub because I’m looking for that one rare human who makes me melt into a puddle of, “I’ll do anything you want me to.”

The most beautiful passage I’ve ever read about kink ...

Why did you love alcohol more than me?

Yesterday I asked people to share questions they'd always been too scared to ask. One of them was, "Why did you love alcohol more than me?" I've tried, with permission, to answer that question.

There once lived a prophetess...

Why I Don't Warn People Before I Delete Their Comments

I don’t warn people that I delete personal insults from my threads because that ethic has existed since the age of enlightenment. When you came to my page, you had decades of life behind you. Whether or not you learned from them was y...

I'm Okay, You're Okay

I rarely trust my perceptions of people. My instincts with assholes have usually been en pointe, so if I’d spent my life trusting myself, my history would be steeped in rainbows and Chanel Number 5 instead of blood and broken glass.

I’m ...

There's a Hole In the Kink Scene Shaped Exactly Like You

When you first develop an interest in BDSM, kink is like Schrödinger’s cat. Maybe when you open the box, you’ll learn that kink isn’t as appealing as you thought it would be. Maybe you’ll learn that it feels like home. The animal could be...

Everything That's Wrong With Those Consent Violation Posts

Bobby Dog always used to get underfoot, so I developed a habit of taking off my shoes when he was nearby. Before I learned my lesson, I was subject to a whole manner of dramatic yelps. It was frightening, so I stopped to examine the offending paw ...

Here's my girl in Carolina

We did so many things and visited so many places. Fet friendships aren't always bunk. 

It’s cool that you have a Super Secret Strategy for The Sex™, but please find someone who fucks with their body. I fuck with my mind.

Ty was very good at The Sex™. You could tell by the two little lines that appeared between his eyes when he went down on you. He had a purpose. That purpose was to expose you to his Super Secret Strategy for The Sex™. It was trademarked and ev...

You Can't Hide in Kink Country

You can get away with a thousand kinds of shitty behaviour if you’re dating in vanilla terrain. That world has biomes the size of China, so lies are easy to maintain.

This is not Vanilla Land, though. This is Kink Country, and it’s the s...

The One Sex Skill Every Cis Man Needs and Few Ever Learn

Yesterday I wrote a post called, “What Cis Men Should Know About Clits.” In the post, I said that mastering Sarah’s clit doesn’t master Jackie’s. You have to start afresh with every new person who deigns to remove their knickers in your ...

Things Cis Men Should Know About Clitoral Orgasms

• The female orgasm is like Nineties Tomb Raider: If you fuck it up, you have to start from the beginning again. This is why sjamboks were invented, so don’t fuck it up, Jack. It will hurt.
• Women are like Nineties Tomb Raider, too. ...
  2023-12-03 06:49:08 +0000 UTC View Post

How to Cure Sub Drop

A warm bath will improve your dopamine levels.

Music speaks to the soul, so make a playlist that suits your mood. Everybody Hurts, say. Or Back to Black. Or I Wanna Rip Out Your Eyes With My Teeth.

Interpretive dance always helps. Find...

So you say Fet is a Sex Site...

Fet is a sex site. If you don't want to see dick, go to Facebook.

The fact that we’re on a kink site is not a reason to heed boundaries less. It’s a reason to be even more careful.

When I first began doing events,...

Don't Commit a Thought Crime. It's Against TOU

When I found out about Submit in February this year, one of the first questions people asked its founder was, “How can we be sure you aren't just another Elon Musk?” The answer? There would be a council, elected by the user base, who would hol...

Questions for Deciding Whether To Go Out If You're an Introvert

Have you racked up a minimum of three days of solitude in a row?

Have you made a comprehensive list of pros and cons for attending the event?

Have you counted your spoons?

Will the people at the event look at you weird if you sit...

So You Think It's Safe to Share Your Real Identity on Fetlife

If you ever become the target of online abuse, people will tell you it’s just the internet. This is a war against pixels, so you can just log off and get back to your white picket fence and daisies. The worst of internet toxicity is picking up a...

I Got a Four-Month Timeout

When I learned of Submit in February this year, its founder told me he’d build his leadership structure in such a way as to encourage accountability. If the leader (himself) had to kowtow to the masses, ethics would be woven throughout the entir...

Since we're doing photos, let's do my US trip

This is Central Park from a horse carriage. MaggieLaFae planned an awesome day for us in NYC. 

2023-11-27 06:59:18 +0000 UTC View Post

I forgot to post photos of my birthday week!

Somehow, everyone ended up getting me tours for my birthday this year, so I got to be a tourist in my city for the first time. This li'l rock is where se...

The Best Laid Plans of Potential Wives and Men Oft Go Awry

When I was 13, I used to dream about confetti and white tulle. Prince Charming would throw away my glass slipper, sweep me up into his arms, and carry me to Marital Bliss Island where all the worthy girls lived. I committed to finding my One True ...

Visa destroys far more lives than my CNC kink

Sexuality is born in the least evolved part of our brains, so it isn’t the most rational kid at the party. Consensual nonconsent is an inherent part of my sexual darkness. If I hadn’t read about it from you… and you… and you, I would never...